I don't know why you say goodbye...

….goodbye….
Depending on the context, that word can bring on tears, heartache, anger, disappointment, joy (depending on the person) and a whole myriad of emotions. It’s amazing how so much feeling is tied up in that one word. Yet how often do we hear that word and think of it as an opportunity? As a beginning instead of an ending? I love this song that expresses this quite nicely…

“I know there’s a blue horizon,
Somewhere up ahead,
Just waiting for me,
Getting there means leaving things behind,
Sometimes life’s so bittersweet

I guess it’s gonna have to hurt,
I guess I’m gonna have to cry,
And let go of some things I’ve loved
To get to the other side.
I guess it’s gonna break me down,
Like falling when you try to fly,
It’s sad but sometimes moving on with the rest of your life
Starts with goodbye.”

We are so desperately afraid of change sometimes, even when change is for the better. But anything that messes up our routine or invades our comfort zone is unwelcome, don’t let the door hit you on the way out. Why have we let goodbyes become this way for us? True, there is often unpleasantness that arises with goodbyes. People have bad memories of goodbyes, but why do we linger on the negative, why do we only remember the hurt? What keeps us from looking ahead, looking to the possibilities and opportunities that have arisen from this goodbye? We are so good at forgetting who is in control, and that God has His reasons for everything.
Think of all the changes in our lives that occurred because of a goodbye….
Two best friends are going to different colleges say goodbye, and now are forced to make new, additional friends….
A job opportunity is taking a newly graduated student away from his family, so he says goodbye, and drives off to a new town, or city, or state, and is forced to grow up….
A boy and a girl decide to end their relationship, so they say goodbye and go their separate ways, and each meet someone new….
Think of everything that happens when we say goodbye! Think of all the places you never would have gone, all the people you never would have met if you had never said a goodbye in your life. God can, and does use any situation that we are in for His glory! Why do we forget this?

I am facing a goodbye, which I have known is coming for a couple weeks now, which makes it worse…
But I was looking back, thinking about how my life has been impacted by this family that I will be saying goodbye to, and I realized how incredibly selfish I am being, on more than one level.
First of all, it serves no purpose for me to mope around and feel sorry for myself, when I could be standing by as an encouragement for this family as they step out on this new adventure. These people are facing much more change than I am, and are having to say many many more goodbyes than I am. The least I can do is be there for them, and support them. Also it doesn’t help them leave any easier if I cling and cry for them to stay.
Secondly, this family has affected me on several levels, emotionally, spiritually and practically. Isn’t it now my responsibility to pass on everything I learned from them? If I benefited from their influence, who is to say that others couldn’t also, even if it’s indirectly? What kind of world would this be if we went around hoarding the knowledge and wisdom we had gained from others? Isn’t that meant to be shared? And I’m sure we do share much of what we’ve learned unintentionally, but what about being intentional about it? What kind of difference would we see in our relationships if that happened? Would we be stronger, mentally and spiritually?

Now granted, all of this doesn’t make goodbyes any more enjoyable, any easier….

But maybe, instead of seeing the glass as half empty, we could learn to see it as half full, and see the world of possibilities that God gives us through a goodbye. His hand is in everything, in every hello, and every goodbye, and there is a reason and purpose for them all.

I’m learning to see God in my goodbyes….